Carpe ponkan

Carpe ponkan, said the wise [webmaster] man. His [surfer] followers did what they always did: [click and] follow. And when their [finger-like] teeth, hungry for knowledge, slid through the ponkan's juicy flesh, streams of [Japan-related] data filled their minds. More and more, they wanted. More and more, they had. Squish'em & click'em!